• Phoenix

An Open Letter To Phoenix...

Dear Phoenix,

I apologize if I've disappointed you this year. I'm sorry for every time I said I would change and didn't. I'm sorry for every time I said I was going to do something and stayed in bed. I'm sorry for the inconsistency, the lies, the heartbreak, the drama (self-inflicted), EVERYTHING! You deserved so much more in 2019 and I wasted it away like you were just a regular bitch.

In 2018, you had the time of your life and you vowed to keep that same energy in 2019. Instead I kept you hidden. I denied every invitation to a party or soiree. The word "no" was used way too often and not in the way it should've been. Instead of saying NO to hurt, I said NO to dates. Instead of saying NO to self-hate, I said NO to ways to expand myself. Instead of saying NO to depression, I said NO to art shows, photography shoots, best friends, and good times.

From the bottom my heart, I am truly, deeply sorry. 2020 will be a ground shaking year. Everything I said NO to in 2019 will come around again, and this year, we will be accepting every invitations and going on first dates. You deserve the absolute best of everything, my love! The best experiences. The best of times. The best of love. The best of YOU!

In this next decade, just know that I will do my absolute best to make you proud and if I fail, know that I will use that L to level it up into a Win. This is my love letter to a girl that is going through a rebirth. That is what a Phoenix does, after all. It's reborn from the ashes and rises again. I look forward to your rise, my love. Until we meet again...

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