• Phoenix

Breakthrough, New You!


You ever wake up and say to yourself, "This is going to be the best day yet!" and they once you're out of the house, the forces of nature say, "Nah we chill on you sis." How do you overcome those days? How do you come out of the state of defeat and continue with the same attitude that you woke up with?


Mental health is something I've struggled with all of my adult life, but it wasn't until I was close to 30 when I figured out that's what it was. I've struggled with depression, anxiety, body image, maternal image, you name it! The feeling of NEEDING to be PERFECT all the time is a blessing and a curse of the generation I belong to: The Millennials.

I became a mother at a young age. I was 19 when I had my first child and with a man that had no clue how to love a woman. We were damaged from jump but we loved each other, ourselves and our child the best way we knew how. I didn't know at the time, but I did go through postpartum depression. I had no support or no one to talk me through how I was feeling. I just knew I was sad all the time. I felt like there was no connection with me and my baby. He cried and so did I! One day I just felt better and never thought about again.

Body image is probably one of the hardest types of depression I've dealt with to date, though. My weight is forever fluctuating, regardless of what I eat, how I exercise, blah, blah, blah! Being fine with my body is something new to me. In my early 20s, I never saw myself as sexy or attractive because I was either treated like I wasn't attractive or was told that I wasn't attractive. Sometimes by the ones closest to me. All that mental abuse did a number on me, so here I am, 30 years old, and I'm just getting to know that my beauty matters, that I am beautiful without being a sample size.


Being a mother is hard. Being a mother to 3 individual human people is even tougher. Being a mother to a brand new child every time he comes to visit is the biggest task. Wondering if you've made the right decisions regarding your children is scary af! If you're a parent, I'm sure you understand. My oldest son lives with his father in Columbus, Ohio. Our middle child, Benjamin lives with me and my youngest son, Liam lives with me also. I'm told that I'm a different person with each of my children but I love them just the same. I, personally, don't believe I'm different with my children but I'm in my own body. My parenting is always questioned by others but parenting is an ever living organism. Who's to say what's right and what's wrong? As long as my children are respectful, healthy, and know their worth as young black kings, my job as a mother is complete.


Throughout the rest of the year, I'd like to continue this series and share with you how I've overcome certain situations. I'd like for you to comment down below on topics for this series. Let's heal each other babes! Until next time...

Phoenix


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